Welp! I pretty much suck at blogging consistently...but my mom forwarded me this hilarious email today so I had to post it! Enjoy!
Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendars
end there because some Spanish d-bags invaded our
country and we got a little busy, OK?
Sincerely,
The Mayans
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving
'til 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns
Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and
have no blood pumping through them, they can
never get an erection.
Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic
Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma's
a b*tch, eh?
Sincerely,
The Titanic
Dear America ,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your
punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada
Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know -
let's Yahoo! it."
Just saying...
Sincerely,
Google
Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president
is black -- WTF happened?!
Sincerely,
1985
Dear Windshield Wipers,
Can't touch this.
Sincerely,
That Little Triangle
Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea... Just kidding!
They're all dead.
Sincerely,
BP
Dear Fox News,
So far, no news about foxes.
Sincerely,
Unimpressed
Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,
Please lknvfdmv.xvn.
Sincerely,
Stevie Wonder
Dear Nickleback,
That's enough.
Sincerely,
The World
Dear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color...
Sincerely,
Black people
Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain... no one wants to run with me
either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin
Dear World of Warcraft,
Thank you for ensuring my son's virginity.
Sincerely,
Parents Everywhere
Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely,
Nail Salon Ladies
Dear Ugly People,
You're welcome.
Sincerely,
Alcohol
Dear White People,
Don't you just hate immigrants?
Sincerely,
Native Americans
Dear iPhone,
Please stop spellchecking all of my rude words
into nice words, you piece of shut.
Sincerely,
Every iPhone User
Dear Giant Spider on the Wall,
Please die. Please die. Please die. Please die.
CRAP! Where did you go?
Sincerely,
Terrified
Dear Trash,
At least you get picked up...
Sincerely,
The Girls of Jersey Shore
Dear Man,
It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant
Dear Dr. Phil,
Look man, there's only room for one fake doctor
in this world and I was here first.
Sincerely,
Dr. Pepper
